Lessons of 2017

I know it’s still only early December, but I’m powering on with Blogmas, and decided to change it round a bit today and write about things I have learnt this year, rather than about my day.
First off
To stop caring what other people think
When my kids want to go swimming, but I refuse to wear a bathing costume, I’m spoiling their fun because of my own silly hang ups. My kids will look back and wonder why I never took them swimming, but will anyone really notice, remember or even care how I looked in a bathing cossie?
Infact, let’s just get this out there now. This is me in a swimming costume. Headless, but me. I took it earlier this year when my main focus on life was to spend 2017 dropping the pounds. The purpose of the pic was for my own personal use only to record progress and defo not share on the internet. Not ever..
I hablogven’t dropped the pounds. I’ve probs chunked up if anything. Happiness and my love for food has stopped me once again this year, no matter how much I work out, which is a lot. Still feel freaking awesome, though
Learn to love yourselves ladies, exactly as you are! 
To never give up
If I want something, no matter how out of reach it may sound, I’m going for it. I’m not talking material. I don’t aspire to live any kind of flash lifestyle. I’m all about character building, confidence building and making dreams a reality.
I’m leaving 2017 proud in what I have achieved and excited for the future. I know exactly where I aim to be this time next year, and I’m gonna get there.
Live in the moment
My children seem to be growing up so fast, too fast and I’m finding it difficult to decided whether my family is complete, or not. I treasure every single night I kiss my girls good night, and every single hug they give. Because one day, sadly they’ll reach an age when they may not want a good night kiss.

Also I like to plan things to look forward to throughout the year. Then spend the days/weeks and sometimes even months in between on a countdown. Then things happen during or after that time that I had no idea would, which I would never look forward to. Not sure this makes sense, but trust me. Don’t wish time away
I am in control of my feelings
I’ve concluded that depression can be ‘cured’, but anxiety cannot. I now understand that to remain in a happy state, I need to fill my life doing things I love with people who bring something to my life. But anxiety lives with me every day. I know this because I wake in the night frequently in a state of panic. It’s when I’m asleep it gets me. So I wake and fill my head with positive thoughts and remind myself of all the reason I have to be happy. I do it in order to regain control. And I win. Every single day
Seeing other people happy
I’m also quite an empath and pick up on others feelings. But one of my favourite things in the world is seeing others happy. If I can do anything to make someone feel special, I will
Surround yourself with positivity
I can’t deal with negativity. Or rather I won’t. Not that I’m often around negativity. You attract the energy you give out, so make it positive
That life is an adventure
An adventure can be jumping out of a plane for some people, or embarking on a journey around the world. For me, it is in creating a life for myself and my family by fulfilling dreams, enjoying family holidays, and making happy memories. Or even just watching fireworks out of the bathroom window
window
Chase your dreams
And turn them into a reality. You’re never to old to do something new, you’ve just got to be brave enough to try. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something, show them you can
The importance of fun
It doesn’t matter where I am, or who I’m with, I often just have a strong desire to be silly, and to laugh. Even if life isn’t going how I’d like it to, or I’m having a bad day. Fun is a priority to me. As a person who spent many, many years feeling sad and unhappy, I realise how important it is to not take life, or yourself, too seriously.
I have become stronger.
So much stronger. I was thinking just yesterday about how many times I have cried this year. Think it’s a small handful. I used to take every single thing to heart and let so many situation or comments reduce me to tears. Now I don’t. I’ve even had moments this year where I’ve thought ‘Why aren’t I crying? Why am I not upset’. It’s because I’m stronger. Still emotional, still sensitive, but stronger.
I have a voice
And I know I’m being heard. I’ve received messsges of support and encouragement from friends, from people I went to school with and haven’t even seen since then, and from complete strangers. And they all tell me the same thing. Keep doing what you’re doing, because you’re helping people. And that’s why I share personal stories. I am a believer if you have a story which could inspire others, you should share it
share
My mindset is rubbing off on my children
One thing which sticks in my mind this year is my 6-year-old daughter asking me if she was awesome, because she felt awesome. She also often tells me, her older sister, and friends they are beautiful. And by this she means inside and out. I love that. I love her expressiveness and her confidence and I’ll do all I can to ensure she grows to be a confident young lady, too
My son also told me this year that he plans to go to uni next year. He said he has big aspirations and knows with hard work and a positive mindset, he can achieve them. He makes me proud every single day
How much I love writing
I just find having the ability to express yourself and open up about things others perhaps wouldn’t, so liberating. It’s also my therapy,  a journal to look back on, and memories for my children once I’m gone.

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